Pondering the Proposition

The ex-pseudo has been hitting me up on the regular these days. We've been kicking it a little bit on the friendship tip. It's been cool. Although he fucked me over on my birthday last year, over time we became cool again and eventually became friends. This negro threw me for a loop yesterday though.

Yesterday when we were talking on the phone he passively mentioned that he was going through a dry spell, and I suggested he get back out in the dating field. He said he wasn't really interested in doing that, a couple of reasons being that he wants to focus on work and he just doesn't really feel like dealing with a lot of the chicks he encounters. Understandable. So I said, as a joke, "well maybe you should go buy some." He was like, "I'm not about to do that," and blah blah blah. So then he said maybe we can start getting up again. I told him no, because I'm seeing someone right now. He responds with: "well maybe we can set up a business arrangement."

Business arrangement huh? From what I gathered dude wants some kind of thing going with me where we hang out, kick it, and fuck each other. But he wants to pay me for it.

I'm not going to lie and say that I'm not thinking about it. I had never actively considered having a sugar daddy. I'm a womanist, and I don't believe in using your body as a commodity to be bought and sold, but dammit if this offer isn't tempting. I already dated the guy before, the sex was fantastic, and things were going fine between us until he fucked that off. The only difference between then and now would be that the former pseudo would now be my sugar daddy.

Is it wrong to have a sugar daddy? People look down on women who use men for money, but in all honesty I've always been in awe of women like that. I found it intriguing how they could use their womanly wiles to get what they want from men. And if you want keep it really real, aren't we all bought and sold on some level? Think about how you spend 40 plus hours per week.

I think the important thing is to maintain control over your body and stay within your comfort zone. I think it becomes a problem when you get to the point where you feel like you're selling yourself out and/or you're doing things that you really don't want to do with people you really don't want to do it with. In my situation I was on the fence about fucking with the pseudo again, but the presidential faces definitely offer an incentive.

The litmus test is: do you feel like you're compromising your integrity? Do you still respect yourself after you're done? Because you can fuck someone without them giving you anything at all and feel very shitty afterward.

I may be met with a lot of disagreement on this one, but these are just my thoughts. Peace.

Press Your Luck

Me and Moms were in Tar-jay at the checkout line when she noticed the August issue of Essence on the news stand. The headline on the cover screamed: "Black Men Want to Meet You! We found 60 SINGLE Doctors, Ministers, Millionaires, and a Prince for YOU. Email them, p. 99." We totally mocked the headline. My initial thought was, damn, do the editors think black women are that desperate?

I already received my August issue in the mail last week. However, mine had Tyler Perry on the cover :-(. I wasn't lucky enough to get the hot guy cover. I had already thumbed through the hot guy spread, but I didn't pay much attention to it.

I began to think, what would happen if I actually sent one of them an email? Would he respond? The curiosity in me said fuck it, try your luck. So I'm going to send Braylon Edwards' fine ass an email and hope hit hits me back. He probably won't, but it would be interesting if I got a response. Wish me luck people. I need some football D in my life.

Peace.


*** BREAKING NEWS UPDATE:

Why did the muthafuckin' email bounce back when I sent it? This is some bullshit! Essence, you are full of ca ca! Now I have to hope I run into him at the club. And it's hard for a classy young woman such as myself to compete with these LA hoochies. *Sighing*

Freestyle Thoughts

I try not to let too much time pass between posts, but I've been slippin'. I've been having a little bit of writers' block lately. I think it may be passing. Just to let everyone know, I'm still alive.

I'm so tired I can't even speak. Like literally, I haven't spoken two words since I got off work @ 5pm. I wonder can I go the rest of the day without having to use my voice?

My supervisor suggested I take a couple of vacation days. Is it that obvious? I'm not an office martyr by any means, but I've been on the grind training for my new position.

I don't know if I mentioned, but I'm getting a promotion. I'm transitioning from lowly Marketing Administrative Assistant to a-little-less-than-lowly Internet Marketing Coordinator. Go me.

On a different note, I love this woman. She is my guru. She's like the seemingly demure aunt who has a shitload of life game. What's not to love about a woman who coined the term "dickmatized" and speaks upon the power of the penis? And she's on myspace too. I'm going to send her a friend request.

Speaking of the power of the penis, I have kinda-bf. I didn't want to write about this person to soon, not knowing how long he was going to be around but it's been six weeks now. I guess I can speak on him now. Now that I'm speaking on him I don't have much to say. I'm going to say that's a good thing, considering how many guys I've blasted on this blog. Check the archives if you don't know.

You can email me now. I know, I'm hella late with this. Hit ya girl up: blackgirlinterrupted04@yahoo.com.

Peace.

Ya girl got a new ride!

The Sentra was turning into a hoopty. The car had some body damage, the transmission was on its way to heaven, and the damn shit acted like it didn't want to accelerate no matter how much I baby-talked it with the pedal to the floor. I had the car for three years. It was an '03 but it looked and drove like I had it for five or ten. It was time for that piece of junk metal to exit stage left. Think about it - how many Nissan Sentras do you see on the road that are more than five years old? If you do its in the slow lane on the freeway or on the side of the road getting a jump.

My own Mama, who pitches a fit every time I even breathe a word about either moving out or buying a new car, even told me after riding in the Sentra on the way to the mall on Tuesday, "Girl, you need to get another car. I don't think this one is going to make it to Saturday." I wasn't actively thinking about getting another car...it was something I would have liked but it wasn't on my to-do list for the immediate future. I said, damn if she's telling me I need a new car, I should consider it.

The first issue I was confronted with was money. My savings are paltry because I insist on having a life. I didn't have a down payment. All I had was that raggedy ass Sentra. I literally went down to Schaier's Nissan in Signal Hill on a wing and a prayer.

I went down, perused the lot, and test drove the 2007 Nissan Altima. I don't know any other way to describe that car other than sexy and fabulous. Perfect for me. It complements me. ;-)

I fell in love during the test drive. I'm not even an Altima fan, I originally wanted a Murano. But this car has power everything, MP3 and blue tooth hookups, it's spacious, sleek...I was smitten. I chose precision grey, between silver and charcoal grey.

Then came the talk of numbers. Somehow I negotiated with the dealer to postdate the down payment over my next two pay periods. And apparently I was in good standing with the finance company because I paid the car note on the Sentra in full and on-time every month, so I got approved for another loan with ease. And, I found out that my credit score was up 30 points from the last time I checked it six months ago. I walked in that piece with no money and walked out in two hours with a brand new car! If I don't have a testimony, then I don't know what it is. God is good!

You know I thought I was the shiznit walking out of there. Couldn't tell me nothin! The car draws so much attention. And I look fabulous driving it. When I was driving down the street I got a lot of looks, and this morning on my way to work this cute guy was driving next to me looking all up in my car! I mean like this negro's body was turned and his head was out the window. Lol. Was he checking for me? The car? Both?

If I don't leave my readership with anything else from this post, I want to express the importance of paying bills on time. Your credit rating matters so much. If your shit is bad you can't get a car, you can't get a place to live, you can't even get a damn phone. Well, you can but it's going to cost you. Prioritize, pay your shit, and save dough!

I sound like a ghetto Suze Orman. I like my quote. I'm copyrighting that shit right now.

Damn did I curse and praise God in one post? I told ya'll I was a heathen. Peace ya'll.

Happy 4th Ya'll!

I hope everyone is having a fantastic holiday and enjoying this break in the middle of the week. I for one am. I've been just hanging out with my friends and family. Oddly enough moms isn't barbecuing this year, so we've making the rounds at everyone else's house, lol.

Stay cool, stay safe, stay up.

Peace.

Sex, Ice Cream, and Peruvian Food

If I had to describe my day in five words or less, there it is.

Celibacy is over. I had all intentions of refraining from men and sex for at least 30 days but that only lasted 3 weeks. I'm glad I gave up celibacy because I was really about to blow a gasket. The person with whom I decided to give up celibacy for is a really great person and I don't regret breaking the vow with him.

I pigged out this weekend. Friday I went to happy hour at this Cuban spot in Downtown LA. I ate a sampler of appetizers ranging from empanadas, plantain chips, and tamales with ham, corn and peas. I ate Peruvian food two days in a row. Last night my friend and I spontaneously decided to eat at a Peruvian restaurant. I dined on lomo saltado with chicken. It was absolutely delicious. Today my best friend and I went to a different spot (we made plans earlier this week to go today) and I had the lomo saltado again this time with tri tip steak. I think the dish is better with steak.

After dinner today I got ice cream. Double scoop of chocolate chip. I did not make it to the gym at all this weekend. This week I plan on doing at least four days of cardio. Three days @ the gym and one night at the club.

This weekend's theme was indulgence. I feel full and satisfied.