Black Girl Interrupted

Laid back, down to earth, & quirky, but also a little bit of a diva...yeah that's me. An oxymoron right? I'm a gumbo of thangs. I refuse to be pigeonholed into any categories! I'm a native Southern Californian living life in the City of Angels. I'm one of the very few Angelenos who is not into the whole Hollywood thing, but I'm still an LA chick through and through. I'm one of those people who lives in her own world. I don't do everything, I just do me.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Damn, its been a minute...

It's been awhile since I've blogged, but the month of June has been quite interesting so far. I decided to go on dating hiatus this month. I got a little inspiration from this post on Southern Lady's blog. I haven't given up on dating completely, but I've definitely reassessed the way I approached dating situations.

An integral part of the June dating hiatus is focusing on myself and what I want. Instead of worrying about these crazy men out here, the bulk of my energy goes to mental, spiritual, and intellectual growth, as well as focusing on my career and having a good ass time doing whatever I'm doing. My goal is to work on self, be the best I can be, and live life to the fullest.

Achieving that goal includes ridding my life of people who aren't good for me. Closing the door on past relationships has done wonders for my psyche. It's not always easy to get rid of the hangers on but it's a necessary evil. They say, "if you're always looking back you can't move forward."

Another central part of the dating hiatus is celibacy. I promised myself that I will be celibate for the entire month of June. That part is really hard, because I appreciate a good piece of pipe. I had been abstaining from sex since May 18 (by default) but the celibacy thing became official on May 31. June seemed like a good time to do it since its smack dab in the middle of the year. I go through these renewal stages every few months or so where I reflect on where I am, where I want to be, what's working for me, and what isn't.

A period of abstinence is good for me because I can really get to know people and spend time with them in a non-sexual way. I always say I want people to respect me and like me for who I am. Sex tends to get in the way of that sometimes.

Btw, for someone who is supposed to be on a dating hiatus, I've been dating a lot. This past weekend I went on 3 dates. Yes, three. That's a record for the most dates in one weekend. I was tired as shit by Sunday night. Two of the three dates were with old friends with whom I reconnected. On each date the gentlemen treated me with the utmost respect and we had a good time. Admittedly, I lost quite a bit of faith in the male gender and some of that was restored this weekend. It was good to observe firsthand that there are some still good men out there. I always knew that there were, but it had just been awhile since I encountered them.

I'm a believer that giving up less of yourself leads to better results with men. I personally think a man who is truly interested in a woman will take the time and get to know her even if sex is not involved. If you want something that's longer lasting, whether it be a friendship or otherwise, the clothes must stay on. I don't mean to sound preachy but that's real talk. I mean, if you want to do the thang, go ahead and do what you do. I'm just saying what's working for me. I recommend it.

Peace ya'll.

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