vacation mode

Since my return from Miami, I've remained in vacation mode. It's hard to come back to real life after days of chilling poolside with a cocktail, hanging out on the beach, soaking up the tropical sun...I want to go back!

Miami was a good trip. It wasn't a party trip like the first time I went. At least not for me. Everyone else out there on Memorial Day weekend was getting their mad party on. I had a ball simply watching the debauchery take place. Miami is definitely a place where hedonism rules. Whatever your indulgence, it's there for you on a sexy platter.

The pseudo and I were just chilling. It was a two person party all weekend. We ate, drank, smoked, chilled by the pool, kicked it on the beach, people watched. Very fun and relaxing. It was just what we both needed. Me because I needed a vacation in light of the layoff, and him because he works too damn much and doesn't make time to relax.

I returned to LA on Saturday, and I've been going out a lot since then. This week I went out 3 out of 5 days. I've been partying way more than usual. Part of it is because my BFF's birthday was this week, but I think on some level I'm celebrating for me too. I have lots to celebrate. I've been liberated from the plantation. My creativity is high. I'm at a place where I can do whatever I want, and that excites me. I can do what I want and not have to take a job simply because I need work. It's a good feeling, I feel energized and ready for the challenge.

I have lots of free time now, which is a good and bad thing. It gives me a lot of time to think. About where I am, where I want to be, and how the hell I'm going to get there. I feel like I need to find a career and stick with it. I keep wanting to try different things but I feel like it's getting in the way of me finding what it is I really want to do. That sounds weird doesn't it? Ideally it's great to try out different things before deciding on one path. But I feel like I change careers so quickly that I don't give myself time to see if I really like it. I don't give myself the chance to see where it can go, what avenues are available within a field or industry.

I know for a fact I want to work in communications. I want to teach too, but that's something that's always going to be available to me. I can always do that later. I want to see where a career in advertising can take me. I did the online advertising thing, I want to do media planning next. See, I can try different things within my industry without doing a total career change. I'm learning!

I'm at a very optimistic place right now and I feel so blessed for it. I was at a bad place for a long time and I'm glad the pendulum has shifted. Thank you Lord. Thank you for blogging as therapy.

Peace,

bgi