she's resurfaced!

What up what up what up! BGI is back in the building live and in color. I'm sorry if you missed me, ya girl has been hella busy as of late.

So much has happened over the past few weeks. I finished my DJ class, I'm official now. DJ Lady Verb! My next move is to buy my own turntables (if GW ever sends my stimulus check...where's my money fool?) and to build a cool ass vinyl collection. I've really learned to appreciate vinyl, 'cause you can't scratch on CD or Ipod. You can scratch your mp3s on your computer if you use Serato, but I'm not on that level yet.

I'm still trying to get out of the hellhole, also known as my place of employment. My focus has shifted from going back to school to become a teacher to getting another full time job. I have bills to pay, and I can't afford to take a pay cut by cutting back on work for school. So my goal is sacrificed for now, as I try to make a living. Doesn't that suck? I can't do what I really want because I have to work. Booooo nigga boooooo.

The pseudo and I had "the talk." You know, "the talk" tends to complicate things. Our relationship is so much better when we are simply enjoying it and not worrying about where things are going. Not to say that people shouldn't discuss the relationship, but when the conversation is super formal and riddled with anxiety, it's not a good look. Discussions about the relationship should be relaxed and positive, without any demands or challenges. It should just flow.

We aren't ready to fully commit right now, but if it's meant to be things will fall into place. We enjoy each other's company and we care for one another. He makes me feel protected, and he makes me feel like the only woman in the world when we're together. That's much more important to me right now than focusing on commitment. I don't need a title on that. I've been in committed situations that were way worse. Viva la pseudo!

From this BGI learned a lesson: enjoy the damn relationship and don't stress about where it's going. I would still stab a bitch over him, but that's because I'm crazy. Hey, it is what it is. Don't start nothing won't be nothing. Women worry about stuff like that. We don't want to feel like we're giving ourselves for nothing. But if a man loves you he'll be there. He will come around on his own. You just do you, Imma do me.

Tata,

BGI

P.S. I didn't forget I got tagged. I see you B!