Playing Hooky

I needed a day off from work. Yesterday while at work, I began to experience sharp pains in my abdomen. I have two weeks till my period so they weren't menstrual cramps. It was a different kind of pain anyway, the kind that wouldn't let me sit upright without bouts of pain. I went home early from work and I'm taking today off too.

After I went home and laid down I felt better. The pain still came and went, but it wasn't as bad as it was when I was at work. I think my body was telling me that I need to take a personal day. I didn't consciously think I was experiencing work stress, but the fact that I feel good again after taking some time off makes me think I was.

I knew something was up because every day for the past week or two, I seriously contemplated calling in sick. Some days I really thought I wasn't going to able to make it, although I couldn't pinpoint what was wrong with me. I can only describe it as an overall shitty feeling.

Every once in awhile its necessary to go ahead and ditch. It's good for you. Sometimes the weekend isn't enough. This is why we get sick days and vacation days, for times like these. I felt kind of bad for taking off in the middle of the week, but the way I was feeling yesterday, I didn't think I would be able to make it through the rest of the day. I really shouldn't feel too bad, because I've never called in sick since I've been working at my job. I've taken days off, but I've never been the one to constantly call in sick.

Tomorrow, back on the grind.

Peace...

BGI: Smarty Mc Smarterson

Damn ya girl is smart! *Jocking myself right now*

Lifted from Southern_Lady

Finally ready again...only a little different this go 'round

The timing seems to be just right for me and the new dude. We are pretty much in the same place when it comes to relationships - we are both open to having one with the right person. We are spending time together and getting to know one another in order to see if the other may be the right person. It's great because its a no-pressure situation. The focus is on enjoying our time together; everything else will fall into place if it's meant to be.

After two years of singlehood, I am ready to have a relationship again. After breaking up with my ex, the idea of being in a relationship again caused me to bolt in the opposite direction of anyone who seemed like they wanted to be with me. I've been ready for love again for almost a year, but I hadn't met the right person for me. I was fine with dating people and spending time with them, but I wasn't about to jump into a relationship simply so I could have a man. I knew that I would be more miserable than if I had remained single.

I had reached a point where I was happy and content being single when I met E. I stopped focusing on having a man and focused on myself. I threw myself into work, pursued my own interests, and spent time with friends and family. My thinking was: I'm single and I'm the most important person in my life, so I need to enjoy my life with myself. Once I settle down I may never get these times back; I need to enjoy spending time with me, because that's the person I was with most of the time. It may sound weird, but that is my way of thinking.

It is very likely that I will end up in a relationship with E, but I still think this way. I realize that the reason many of my past relationships failed is because I lost myself in the relationship. I diverged from focusing on myself and made the relationship the center of my world. The source of my happiness cannot come from someone else. It has to come from within.

Tha Randomness...

Usually when you're thinking of someone, they are thinking of you too, in whatever capacity. Funny thing - I was talking about my first boyfriend to someone, and he randomly called me today just to see how I was doing. He usually calls me every six months or so to see if I'm still alive.

Karma is a motherfucker. The saying, "what goes around comes around" is very cliche, but so true. This is why I think twice when I am thinking of doing something that may be fucked up.

I lost five pounds. I already thought I had it going on, but now you really can't tell me shit. I dropped a whole dress size. I'm back into a size six. Come summer I'm going to be a hoochie. Well not really, I'm lying. I don't feel comfortable showing too much skin.

I should have played hooky from work earlier this week so I could see Obama. Since I missed him I'll donate $20 to his campaign. Every little bit helps.

Is it simply a coincidence that whenever I'm in a happy dating situation, my loved ones are experiencing unhappiness in theirs? It's crazy how our love lives are never in sync.

Peace...

Seething over here...

I'm pissed off right now. Just did my taxes (twice, just to double check myself) and I owe the IRS $19. Sure its a nominal amount, but considering the fact that the federal government deducts at least $125 from each paycheck, one would one assume that she would some sort of refund come tax season. Where the hell does the money go? I don't see the benefits of it. Not in my community, not really anywhere in the US. I want to see a statement summary! Who in the hell creates these tax tables? What is it based on? Why are the calculations so schizophrenic? I'm not going to bitch and moan about having to pay taxes, but I feel like Uncle Sam borrowed money from me and when I asked him to pay me back, he's like, "bitch, fuck you I ain't giving you shit...and the next time I want money you will give it to me or I'm charging you interest."

I just want a tax refund. Is that too much to ask? The fact that I'm single, I don't have dependents, assets, or even that many deductions is not working for me...a chick just wants a little something back for those hundreds of dollars deducted from her paycheck monthly.

I feel like crying, although I don't do the whole raw emotion thing.

Valentine's Day is for suckas...

...just kidding. Kind of. Ok, so my plans for Valentine's Day aren't what most would consider romantic, and for damn sure not lovey-dovey. My new friend and I decided that we are going to go out for burgers. Yes, we are going to In-N-Out and we are going to lay hands on some double-double cheeseburgers and fries. We wanted to spend time together on V-day, but I don't feel comfortable doing the traditional "nice" dinner and gift exchange thing so early in the game. Since my friend (who will be referred to as E from henceforth) and I just started seeing one another, I want to keep things casual for now.

E is super cool. He's very laid back, handsome, and very sweet. He treats me like the queen I am (which I absolutely love) and he adores me. I'm vain, so I revel in that. I feel like the man I date should love me just as much as I do. I met E about a month ago outside the Garden of Eden, and he used to date this chick I know, but I'm not friends with her. So he's fair game. Word on the street is that she's hatin' real hard right about now but that's her issue, not mine.

I'm really enjoying getting to know E. He is someone I could see myself seriously dating. I'm not going to press the situation though. I'm enjoying spending time with him and being in his company.

My dilemma is that I want to have sex with him really really bad, but I know its too soon. I want to spend more time getting to know him without sex involved in the equation. I've made the mistake of having sex with a guy I'm dating too soon, and it can be detrimental to building a solid foundation for companionship, friendship, and/or a relationship. Knowing what I know, I have since implemented a 45 day probationary period before becoming intimate with a guy. Some may say thats too soon, but shit most people I know barely wait 2 or 3 weeks before jumping somebody's bones. 45 days is a long time, especially when you haven't had sex since New Year's.

19 days until I can make E my sex slave...

Happy Valentine's Day!!

BGI is not partaking in all-star weekend 2007...

I love meat market festivities as much as the next person. But I decided to opt out of All-Star Weekend this year.

Everybody and their mother is going to be there, but I don't feel like I'll be missing out on anything if I don't go. I had originally planned on going but a couple of weeks ago I had a sudden change of heart. I don't feel like dealing with hundreds of thousands of hoochies and the men who love them for an entire weekend. I don't want to interact with faux ballers and be strong-armed into paying $150 cover charges for parties. Plus, I want to save my vacation time for a real vacation, not for Vegas. I can go to Vegas anytime. It's only a 4 hour drive from LA. I wasn't planning on going to any of the games anyway, I was only going for the parties. I can party anytime.

I have a lot of other things I can do with the time and money I was going to spend in Vegas. I already scheduled spa day for myself, and I'm saving the money I would have spent in Vegas toward a down payment on a new car.

Plus, All-Star is going to be way more crackin' next year in New Orleans. Ya girl will definitely be in the Dirty Dirty painting the town red.