Breakin' It Off

"They never really miss you 'til you dead or you gone, so on that note I'm leaving after this song..."

I was listening to The Black Album on my way home from work today. Dec. 4th is my shit! But my absolute favorite song on that album is Allure.

Oh wait...that wasn't the point of the above quote.

Update on the situation with E...I broke it off with him. I'm sure my friends are giving me a round of applause right now. But that's not all there is to it. (Sorry Kenny!) I'm still kind of seeing him. I told him that I didn't want to date him anymore because I felt disappointed, unappreciated and like he is wasting my time. But I still want to spend time with him and talk to him. The only difference is that we won't be intimate anymore.

After having the conversation with E I have seen a significant difference in the way he has been treating me. In a way it pisses me off because I feel like it took me breaking things off with him and denying physical intimacy for him to treat me the way I want to be treated. A part of me wants to rekindle things with him, but my sane side is telling me to give it some time to see whether he's really sincere or whether he's playing nice to reel me back in. He can only play the role for so long before his true intentions surface.

I think this break will be a good time for me to assess where things are with him and see where the situation goes. This could be just a rift in our dating situation or it could be what ends it. Only time will tell. I don't want to simply walk away without at least seeing what happens if we continue seeing each other.

However, I will be seeing other men. E and I have been seeing each other pretty much exclusively since the beginning. I think its important to approach dating as one would investing--diversify. Investing all you have into one thing is bad business and you run the risk of losing it all if the market crumbles. I feel like if I date other people I'll be less likely to rush back into a situation with him before I'm ready.