Just Reflecting

It seems like when you stop looking, you find someone who truly complements you. At least that has been my experience for the past couple of months. I had been on a man-break for a year when fate brought someone wonderful my way. I suppose when you are truly single, it gives you the opportunity to do a self-evaluation and rebuild yourself from broken past relationships.

Once upon a time I was a person who moved from relationship to relationship with no break in between. And I always wondered, why do I keep experiencing hurt from men over and over again? At first I blamed men in general, citing their inability to be faithful and caring. I figured they lacked the innate ability to consider other besides themselves. This is the case for many men (and women), but I began to realize that it was unfair to blame the male species when I was allowing myself to experience heartache. If I keep experiencing the same thing over and over again, maybe I should look into myself and see what is going on. If the pattern keeps repeating itself, its not them, its me.

Upon doing some soul-searching, I stopped looking for someone else to love me and make me happy. Of course I do want those things, but I have to do those things myself in order for someone else to do it. I don't think I completely lacked self-love and appreciation, but I thought that it would somehow validate me if I received those things from a man. I found that the goal was not to find someone who completes you, but complements you.

Its important to be honest with yourself. It is important to consider the motivation for being with someone. Is it because you truly care about that person and enjoy them, or is it because you just want to be with somebody, anybody?

This go 'round I know better. I don't know things are going to transpire this time. I'm hoping for the best, because dude is mad cool. Hopefully things will work out. If it doesn't, it would suck ass, but I suppose it would mean that destiny had someone else in mind for me.